The Goat

It might look more like something you’d wear for chopping wood than skiing, but Marmot’s new Cat Track Insulated Jacket is a sick deal at $260. They waterproof it with their spray-on PreCip which will keep you dry for a few years, and they pack it with synthetic insulation so you don’t need to layer up. Plus you won’t look like you just got back from the Himalayas if you wear it in the city.

Eighties sunglasses maker Suncloud is back but without the rose colored tint that made them famous. They came out strong with about 30 styles six months ago, but things must not be going too well since they haven’t bothered making a website. Sunglasses giant Smith actually owns Suncloud, and they’re trying to reinvent the brand as a price point polarized option and steal some of the market from Chilis (which apparently doesn’t have a website either).

While your friends are trying to saw through their thick yellow nails with a puny scissors, you’ll be cutting with precision usually reserved for Swiss soldiers. Wenger’s Swiss Army Nail Clip Knife might not have a very impressive name, but at least you know what you’re going to get.

Trail Blazer recently began making their axes and saws with non-slip handles and bright colors. If axes are slipping out of people’s hands and flying into the woods or their friend’s tents, it seems a little late to be addressing the problem after all these years. I have a hypothesis that this will actually cause more injuries and lost axes since people will count on being able to find their hatchet after trying to throw it into a tree.

Masai Barefoot Technology shoes look like they’re made to rock back and forth letting you smoothly walk across the ground, but they actually have a soft spot near the heel that creates natural instability so your body has to react with increased muscle activity. The idea is that you get a workout since you’re constantly adjusting your balance to stay on your feet. It’s hard to believe that people are so lazy about working out that they would resort to these hideous shoes.

Their office line lets you get a workout without ever leaving your job, of course you’ll have to deal with all the orthopedic shoes questions. An alternative is to just get really wasted and walk home from downtown after work—that way you would get your off-balance walking workout in normal shoes, and it wouldn’t even seem like that bad of a walk/workout in the middle of winter.

Nikon’s new $1300 16×32 StabilEyes binoculars are waterproof, fog free, and they even have an image stabilization button that makes their massive magnification easy on your eyes. Of course, for that much money you could buy a pretty sweet plasma HDTV and just watch Animal Planet all day. Don’t leave these under your seat on $1 beer night at the baseball game.

Apparently these guys couldn’t keep warm in each other’s beards so they decided to take this hilarious picture. Adventure Medical Kits says their survival Heatsheet is 20% larger than the competition—that’s the detail you’ll be giving people if you manage to make it out alive.

You just paddled 20 miles and your arms are ready to fall off. Your fellow camper was nice enough to start the water for some tea, but what’s this, you’re in charge of folding the mugs? Meet Orikaso, the flatware that actually folds flat, and then takes a few minutes to fold back together when it’s time to eat. Hopefully you’re not one of those hikers that likes to walk until you collapse with double vision at dinnertime. These might weigh a little less and be a lot cheaper than titanium and they also might be easier to pack, but come on, you have to fold them every time you want to eat? There are some places you just can’t compromise.

Be the 4000^th person to visit the least usable website in the outdoor industry. This thing looks like one of the owners kid’s made it in computer class back in 1998. If you can’t figure out how to see more products, scroll to the bottom and click “Next page.” You can’t get back to the home page so don’t try. When you’re ready to stop looking at the Michigan Militia survivalist gear that WFS calls “Hunting Apparel” and you want to take a look at patriotic chairs for NASCAR races, just click on the navigation bar on the left side. Check the counter on the bottom to see how well this thing is doing.

Hobie’s MirageDrive might already be a good way to cheat at the kayak race (you’ll have to wear a goofy cowboy hat or something to draw attention away from your pedaling) but if you’re cheating, you may as well really upgrade. In spring of 2007 Hobie is offering a Mirage ST Turbo Kit that replaces your pedal blades with longer blades that have a flame job. Well, it’s not really a flame job so much as lightening bolts, but you better believe it’ll make you go faster. They do it by making the MirageDrive’s blades longer, try to stay out of shallow water so you don’t conspicuously beach yourself during the race.