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Tea Picked by Monkeys. It’s About Time, *Sigh*

By Rocky Thompson on January 10th, 2008

monkey-tea

I’ve dreamed of the day we would be able to enslave the monkeys to do our menial data entry and tea picking, and finally that day has arrived. This Monkey Picked Tea from China is picked by the only beasts you can pay with bananas and keep in cages. Soon their Chinese masters will be sending them overseas to clean your bathroom and call in sick for you when you’re not really sick (just hungover). The tea costs $25, and I’m having a hard time deciding if it’s morally fair trade.

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This entry was posted on Thursday, January 10th, 2008 at 4:22 pm and is filed under Story. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

6 Responses to “Tea Picked by Monkeys. It’s About Time, *Sigh*”

  1. jen January 10th, 2008 at 7:33 pm

    i cant stop laughing

  2. whiskyTango January 10th, 2008 at 9:23 pm

    I bet the free trade monkeys are going apes over this.

  3. Lachland January 11th, 2008 at 9:42 am

    PRAY…FOR…MOJO

  4. David R January 11th, 2008 at 10:31 am

    I dunno….I’ve been to the zoo and seen what monkeys do to themselves. How do we know this stuff is all tea?

  5. josh January 11th, 2008 at 1:09 pm

    aren’t monkeys notorious for shitting in their hands and flinging it around? maybe having them pick tea with the same hands ain’t such a great idea …

  6. Justin K January 14th, 2008 at 9:15 am

    I can not wait to scream “BRING ME MY MONKEY TEA!”
    While I plot my fiendish schemes!